The book states that the difference between interpersonal communication ethics and the rest of the field of communication ethics in general is this: the attentive concern for the relationship between the people. The supporting framework of interpersonal communication ethics is the protection and promotion of the good of the relationship, that the relationship is the carrier of identity. For interpersonal communication ethics, if the interaction no longer benefits the relationship, then move on! Move to a different form of communicative interaction. There is a rejection of the idea of self-approval, the need and desire for approval whether from oneself or from the other person in the relationship. It's not simply about a "you" and "me" mentality, but the relationship as a whole and what brings us together.
I think a good way to analyze the idea of interpersonal communication ethics is to compare the dating social media eHarmony and Tinder. Both social media operate around the goal of interpersonal communication, nurturing relationships in their own unique ways, but the two go about promoting the good of the relationship in different ways. Although both social media aim to promote the good of the relationship, each brings up completely different connotations when mentioned. Why is that?
Interpersonal communication works for the good of the relationship between or among a small number of people, usually 2 to 4. Both eHarmony and Tinder meet this qualification because they aim to nurture relationships between two people. Check.
Distance provides the necessary space for each communication partner to contribute to the relationship. Here's where eHarmony and Tinder begin to differ: contribution. eHarmony participants contribute much more to the development of the relationship through the creation of in-depth personality profiles and compatibility. Tinder participants contribute far less to the development of the relationship with only small blurps about themselves (hair color, eye color, age, status) and a simple "swipe left" or "swipe right" based on these surface characteristics.
Interpersonal responsibility is perhaps where eHarmony and Tinder differ the most. Interpersonal responsibility is each person's commitment to active care for the relationship and it would appear that eHarmony participants demonstrate much greater levels of interpersonal responsibility versus Tinder participants.
Your analysis of Tinder and eHarmony was incredibly fascinating. When I was reading the chapter, I didn't really think of how social media and networking could play into the ethics of interpersonal relationship, but after reading your blog, it's so clear that it does. I think the difference between interpersonal responsibility is what really makes Tinder and eHarmony different. Like you said, I think eHarmony subscribers probably feel a larger sense of interpersonal responsibility to the relationship because I think people tend to be more serious about finding a good, strong relationship. With Tinder, I feel like people are doing it more for fun and if a relationship emerges, great, but it isn't a goal. When finding an interpersonal relationship is more important, a person is more likely to use interpersonal communication ethics to nourish that relationship and interpersonal responsibility is an important component to that.
ReplyDeleteThat was a very interesting example of relationship ethics. You did a good job of highlighting some of the main points of the chapter through the comparison of dating websites. I had never heard of Tinder. Their Wikipedia page says that it has been compared to the website "Hot or Not" which goes with what you wrote about eHarmony being the more serious dating site. So, yes, in that respect, eHarmony would is a better site for nurturing the relationship.
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