Thursday, February 13, 2014

Blog 4: Chapter 4

After reading Chapter 4 in the textbook, I can totally relate to the idea that "common sense" is not actually common, and is learned through experiences shaped by culture, gender, race, etc.  An example that I can apply from my own life is learning how to communicate appropriately with my boyfriend's family.  I was born and raised in the U.S., but my boyfriend's family immigrated here from India, although they are actually Muslim.  Sometimes, it can be hard for me to discern which set of values they expect me to adhere to, because although they identify with the cultural aspects of India, their primary belief system revolves around their religion.  Therefore, I had to learn to become familiar with Indian culture as well as Muslim values, in order to be able to communicate in a respectful, and comfortable way with them. 

A specific example I can think of, where miscommunication happened due to my lack of "common sense," is when a family member of my boyfriend passed away.  I immediately sent flowers and a sympathy card to his family, but soon discovered that what to me seemed to be an acceptable and kind gesture, was looked at in their culture as tacky and rude.  Neither of us are wrong in our views, I had to learn to adapt to a differing belief set than my own.  It hadn't even occurred to me that I should have first asked my boyfriend what the appropriate way to convey my condolences would have been, because I assumed my sending flowers was the "common sense" reaction.  Although there have been some awkward moments, I have definitely learned to have a greater appreciation for different value systems, and be more open minded to the fact that what I may perceive to be common sense may not be the same for others.

1 comment:

  1. You provide an awesome example of common sense and how it differs not only contextually, but culturally as well! It must have been quite a challenge to restructure your original view of common sense to include a more 'worldly' perspective! I think that this skill that you have learned could benefit everyone immensely if they took the time to sit down and think hard about how what 'we' personally know is not the same for everyone around us. Hopefully, although there is a significant culture difference and perspective on common sense between your boyfriend and his family and yourself, they took the time to consider the context that you come from and the reason for why you sent the flowers even though it may have been inappropriate in their context. Like you stated, I think its really important for everyone to have a greater appreciation for differing value systems, not only will this bring more people together but it promotes acceptance. Nice post!

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